Incest
by SilaOfCreo
Summary: Sakura loses a bet. Sasuke loses his mind. Ino is a conniving moron. SasuSaku


_A/n: Naruto does not belong to me. This story, which is spilt into two parts, is in Sakura's point of view during _Sakura's Loss_ and is in Sasuke's point of view during _Sasuke's Loss._ It might be a little out of character. Also, there isn't any actual incest in here._

_Incest_

_Sakura's Loss_

I glared at my useless cards, reflecting that I really shouldn't play poker. At least, I shouldn't play poker with stakes.

Ino smirked at my hand and laid down her own cards: three kings and two jacks.

"I win!" She declared needlessly.

I would have said something sarcastic if I hadn't been so concentrated on imagining my demise at the hands of that hot teammate of mine. Oh, I could already see that trademark glare marring his handsome features. He would be so irked by me that he would burn me to death with one of his jutsu. That way, he wouldn't have to bother with burying me in the backyard-

"Well, Sakura," Ino said, bringing me out of my nightmare, "You know what you have to do."

I groaned, but nodded my head all the same. Ino took me by the arm and headed for her closet, smiling all the way.

When Ino was done dressing me, we headed for the Uchiha compound. Ino gave me a thumbs up and hid in the bushes, leaving me in front of the entrance. I was about to knock when I realized that the Uchiha compound was kind of huge. Sasuke wouldn't possibly be able to hear a polite knock from in there. So what else could I do…?

Then, genius struck.

"Hey! Sasuke!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, hoping that if I was loud enough, Sasuke would think I was drunk (or Naruto in disguise. Either way was fine with me.) "Come to the door!"

Nothing. So, I resorted to yelling 'Sas-uke' and Sas-gay' and 'Sasuke has a pole up his ass. The doctor came to remove it.'

I added pounding on the door to my attempt to get Sasuke to the door when he still didn't come, and I heard Ino whisper, "Be nice!" from the bushes.

When my ruckus did nothing to bring the Uchiha to the door, I stopped making noise and turned to Ino's bush. I was about to ask her if we could just leave when the door opened.

Sasuke stared me down with that trademark glare, the katana in his hand crackling with electricity. At that moment, all I could think was 'Crap! He even has a weapon at the ready!'

Sasuke looked like he was about to say something, but then he stopped, his eyes traveling down my body. His lips parted very slightly and his eyebrows raised a miniscule amount (probably as close to a surprised expression as he could get.)

The reason for that could have been the clothes I was wearing. Two wraps, one around my breasts and one on my hips, were the only things I was wearing. They were extremely form-fitting, leaving almost nothing to the imagination. (I wondered what was going on in Sasuke's imagination just then.)

I couldn't blame him for staring. On the contrary, if he hadn't stared, I would have thought he was gay or I wasn't aesthetically pleasing.

A rustle of leaves from Ino's bush reminded me that I still had more to do. I contorted my face into something hopefully sexy-looking and pecked Sasuke on the cheek.

"Don't worry, Sasuke-kun," I cooed, internally crying, "I'll have ten of 'em popped out by the time we're thirty."

He blinked, Ino roared with laughter, and I ran, grabbing my hysterical friend from the bushes and spitting out, "Sake. Your house. Now."

I really needed to not be sober just then.

_Sasuke's Loss_

I stood at the entrance of the Uchiha compound for some time, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. Sure, I knew Sakura had a crush on me since the academy days, but she wasn't a slut. She would never walk around Konoha dressed on the verge of indecent exposure. Dressing like that really could have caused her trouble if a few drunkards had seen her…

Wait a second. Had Sakura been drunk? She had said something about sake to Yamanaka.

That blonde moron! She let Sakura wander around half-naked and drunk?!

I headed for Yamanaka's house, itching to find Sakura (but not sure why).

I entered Yamanaka flower shop and the first thing I heard was bottle's clinking. Then I heard a loud drunk say something from the office, "Stop takin' muh sa-sa-sa-" (That loud drunk was Sakura.)

"Sasuke?" I heard Yamanaka say in a sly voice.

"Yeah," Sakura agreed, "Stop takin' muh Sasuke."

I got the feeling Sakura wasn't talking about me.

A loud slurping noise came from the office and Sakura sighed happily. "Mmm…Sasuke."

That was enough. I entered the office just as Sakura took a greedy swig from a sake bottle. Yamanaka was trying (and failing) to take it from her.

I glared at the blonde even as she struggled with Sakura for the bottle. "Why did you allow Sakura to wander around drunk?"

"She wasn't drunk befo-"

Sakura pushed Yamanaka to the floor and walked over to me. (With each step, the wrap around her hips slid up a little, threatening to show off everything.)

"Y'know," Sakura said, glaring at my nose, "It's guys like you who's always tryin' ta take muh Sasuke."

I blinked, not sure how to respond.

"Yeah," she agreed with herself, "Guys like you is sayin' dat girls shun't have Sasuke." Sakura took another swig of her drink. "'Cus I like Sasuke."

I blinked again, at a loss for words until Sakura brought the sake to her lips again. I grabbed it from her, threw it across the room, and threw her over my shoulder. "I'll take her home."

I left the room, only realizing once I was out of it that I had no idea where Sakura lived. Sakura was fast asleep and I wasn't about to ask Yamanaka, so I decided to bring Sakura back to the Uchiha compound.

Sakura was still fast asleep when we arrived at the compound, so I let her rest in my bed. She had been so drunk that when she woke, she would have a hangover and probably need a cold shower.

I'd be there to wash her up…

Hold on. Did I just think about taking a shower with Sakura? That's like imagining taking a shower with your sister…your exceptionally sexy sister who has almost no clothes on and if you slid that skirt up just a little you could completely ravage-

"No! Stop that!" I yelled at myself, causing the source of my problems to stir.

Sakura groaned and sat up slowly, rubbing her head as she did.

"Sakura," I said softly, "How are you feeling?"

"I'm…fine." Through her hesitation I could tell she was lying, but I didn't press it.

Then, she turned her head away from me and silence reigned. I'm not one to make conversation, so I wasn't going to say anything…and the silence stretched on.

Finally, though, Sakura turned back to me. "I'm sorry…earlier…"

"It doesn't matter," I said, joining her on the bed.

…

Sakura + me + bed = …

Go away incestful thoughts!

Sakura looked at me questioningly, "Sasuke, are you blushing?"

I was about to answer with a definite 'no,' but then two blonde idiots barged into the room.

That moron, Naruto, jumped in between Sakura and I and Yamanaka pulled out a bottle of sake with my name written on it.

As the idiot annoyed me about something that probably involved ramen (I wasn't listening. Who would?), Yamanaka taunted Sakura with the Sasuke bottle in her hand. I was content just to know that I could charge them with trespassing…

(…even if I couldn't be alone with Sakura.)

"I said no incest!"

Three wets of eyes were trained on me, disbelieving.

Yamanaka simply gaped. (She barely knew me.)

Naruto grinned stupidly, a knowing glint in his eye. (He knew me too well.)

Sakura was frowning. (She must have thought I went crazy.)

And I wondered how I was supposed to explain this one.


End file.
